A few days ago I was at an event taking place in a highschool auditorium. I arrived about a half hour early and proceeded to take a seat in the auditorium and wait for the rest of my friends to arrive. Earlier in the day, I had come across a used car I was interested in buying, and figured since I had 30+ minutes of time to kill, I may as well put it to good use so I took out my iPhone and began researching the market value the car on edmunds.com.

For those of you unfamiliar with edmunds.com, clicking on the above picture should help you to visualize / understand the rest of this story.

So there I was, minding my own business checking boxes next to the options this particular vehicle is equipped with: Navigation, heated seats, leather interior and then all of a sudden I hear a voice behind me, reading each option as I checked it then saying things like “automatic headlamps, yea those are very important, whatever would we do without those”. I turned around to see a 50 year old man Read the rest of this entry »

Since I get to bitch and you don’t, you’ll either agree with my bitching and join my various causes against stupidity everywhere, or you’ll hate my rants so much that you will get the general public to stop being complete morons so I don’t have anything more to bitch about. Pick your poison, I really don’t care so long as you Listen To Me Bitch.

Now with that out of the way…

One thing that has been prominently pissing me off lately is the general disrespect for English words in their entirety. To my dismay, some people find it necessary to bring abbreviations and/or internet slang into normal, face to face conversation wherever possible. Just this week I have heard sentences such as:

• Totes yo that was a seds pross, nevs again.

(Translated: That was totally a serious process that I would never like to experience again.)

• Don’t hate cause I like hella abbrevs, lolz 

(Translated: Don’t make fun of me because I like to sound like a complete moron for no good reason, (and then proceed to pronounce “lolz”))

Are you so incredibly lazy that you can’t even speak complete words and sentences? If so, I hereby take away your right to bitch about Latin American immigrants coming in and not speaking English. I know enough Spanish to realize Read the rest of this entry »